MORPH, or Gregor Turns over a New Leaf
By Barry S. Willdorf
As read at Feathered Pipe Ranch on August 18, 2000.

Before I tell this story, I have a few announcements:

Some of the language in this story may be unsuitable for small children and members of the religious right. If you are among these groups, you may wish to leave the room and consult with the volunteer attorneys that we have made available. They are out in the hall prepared to assist you with your: a) complaints, b) lawsuits and/or c) boycott plans–pick one.

Neither the management of the Feathered Pipe Ranch nor the creator of this story take any responsibility whatsoever for its contents.
The following could not have been made possible without the inspiration of Franz Kafka, Louis Carroll, B. Traven and Judith Lasater, although not necessarily in that order.

Special thanks go to the Water Quality Assurance Board and British Ford Corporation, the owners of Lotus™ who, together with other fine corporations, are working tirelessly to make every word in the English language someone’s intellectual property. Read the rest of this entry »