GUN LOBBY RALLIES AROUND SANTORUM!

“You’ll have to pry my cold dead hands off my sweater vest,” NRA President Rick O’Shay said today as he fondled a moth-eaten woolen object that looked to be tartan plaid. “It’s been in the closet too long and we’re just glad that Santorum had the balls to pull it out. You know, this is one sweater that really stands for the right to bare arms, something we’re all for. It’s a shame that no one was willing to come out wearing one until Santorum.  He’s sure demonstrated his leadership abilities with his clothing selection. What more can you ask from a presidential candidate?

“A few weeks ago, when Newt Gingrich was shooting off his mouth, we thought that we’d found the guy for us, but then he started shooting from the hip and we began to wonder, how’s he going to hit anything that way? Read the rest of this entry »

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LOBBYIST DEMANDS CANDIDATES PLEDGE TO RESTORE FEUDALISM

After repeated demands for him to detail the ultimate objective of his campaign to require candidates for public office to swear an oath never to collect taxes, Grubby Ouldquest, the super-lobbyist that some have called “king-maker” finally admitted today that his real mission was to restore feudalism.

Holding a copy of the U.S. Constitution, Ouldquest pointed to the Preamble. “Look at this,” he said excitedly. “The purpose of our government is to ‘promote the general welfare.’ Welfare! This is nothing but a utilitarian SOCIALIST document and it ought to be just tossed in the trash heap of history where it belongs.” Read the rest of this entry »

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TOLERATING INTOLERANCE

The bishops of the Catholic Church have decided that Catholic Charities must get out of the adoption business because they can’t tolerate government regulations that prohibit their intolerance of gay couples who want to adopt. They say that their freedom of religion is being violated if they can’t use government money in a discriminatory manner. It’s all right for them to take tax money collected from gay people. They have no problem with the taking part. Their only problem is in the giving. They just think that their rights are being trampled upon if they can’t exclude gay people from getting back any benefits from that money. That’s their idea of religious freedom. What we have here is a perfect example of the consequences of recent encroachments by the government on the clear prohibition in the First Amendment against establishment of religion. We’ve been sold a bill of goods by the right wing that it’s not a violation of the constitution to give money to religious organizations for charitable or educational purposes. This little stunt by the bishops demonstrates the result when you push over the line. We should simply not be giving any money to any religious organization, regardless of their so-called charitable or educational purposes. Religious organizations can’t help themselves.  By their nature, all religions are prejudiced. They will move heaven and earth to discriminate in favor of their dogma. The Catholic Church, of all entities in the world, ought to have a handle on the proposition that the taking and giving of money comes with strings. Strings on financial transactions is what they have been doing since they got into the religion business two thousand years ago. They are the masters and they have plenty of money. If they want to discriminate in their adoption services, they should use their money and not be taking money from tax payers who don’t like their discriminatory policies and should have to fund their prejudices. But putting up their own money for adoptions is apparently not their idea of a good investment. Quite frankly, I think we’re all better off with these medieval, pedophilia-pandering bishops out of the adoption business.

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The Holiday Spirit?

This holiday season:

  • The Catholic Archbishop of San Francisco dis-invited three clergy who were scheduled to speak at a Catholic Church because they were too gay.
  • It was disclosed that there are an average of ten fights per game in the stands at 49er’s games.
  • The Golden State Warriors took the position that sending xerox copies of genitalia to women was evidence of a consensual sexual relationship.
  • Nikki Haley, the governor of South Carolina accused the federal government of “bullying” her state because it prohibited her from kicking previously registered black voters off the voter rolls.
  • Lowe’s Hardware continued to stand by it’s decision to withhold advertising from a T.V. show that portrays American Muslims as ordinary folks because a single white guy protested that it showed Muslims too positively.
  • In Pennsylvania, a guy who claimed he was “cleaning his gun and it went off by accident”  killed an 18-year old Amish girl two miles away.
  • YOU ARE WELCOME TO ADD MORE CHEERFUL NEWS IN COMMENTS!

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ARAB SPRING-ISLAMIST WINTER

The recent elections in Tunisia, Morocco and now Egypt resulted in Islamist parties gaining majorities while secularists were soundly rebuffed. Our government does not appear worried by this. I am. The results offer a sobering counterpoint to the euphoria many of us felt over the last several months as dictators across North Africa (Tunisia, Libya, Egypt) were overthrown in spontaneous uprisings. Currently, similar dissatisfaction is brewing in Algeria and Yemen.  A civil war is raging in Syria. In each case, the impetuses for the uprisings have been disaffected youth protesting high unemployment, political repression and generally a life that looked to have no future.  But wherever there have been regime changes (or in the case of Morocco, the attempt to ward off regime change) elections have resulted in something quite different from the politics of the activists that led them.

There is precedent for such outcomes. As an attorney during the 1970’s, I represented Iranian students who were being hunted in the U.S. by SAVAK, the secret police of the former Shah, Reza Pahlavi. These students were active in organizations seeking the overthrow of the Shah, a loyal retainer of the United States, and the restoration of Iranian democracy. Once SAVAK identified a student as an opponent of the regime, it worked with its colleagues in the CIA to have him (or occasionally her) deported.  Students who were forcibly returned to Iran had little hope of survival. Read the rest of this entry »

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